Emotional Healing Through Breathwork
Posted on February 19, 2017 by Tom
An old man once told me that I was enclosed by an emotional armor that
prevents me from moving into new realms of wonder. “The
armor shields you from vulnerability,” he saidIt’s
comprised of old emotions, and it blocks you from dancing the dance your
soul longs for.”
He said the armor is a conglomerate of energies, of my own making, that
do not resonate high enough on the vibrational spectrum to keep a fluid
flow. He said the old emotions are like icy metal, needing to be
transformed through heat…or intent.
In the past, when I would meditate, I often had direct experiences of an emotional
body within me. As I would sit, focused on my breath,
pain would rise up from out of nowhere. This pain was accompanied by
negative emotions I had been holding in me. During those days, it had
always been in my thighs.
It was as if I would travel to a level of consciousness where I was able
to manipulate this armor and set motion to parts that were stagnate.
This motion came about when I gave my attention to the old residue. It
would then dissipate and the energy would flow once again. It was as if
the clearing of these kinks would open the valve for energy to flow more
I know a guy named Dean. He’s an eternity suited geometrician, under the
guise of LCDC at a drug treatment facility in town. He’s a connoisseur
of emotional intelligence, and there was a time when he had helped me to
rekindle my own contact with such.
On Sundays, he would bring humongous PA speakers to the group room at
the rehab and facilitate something he called Access
Breathwork–an intense use of the breath that can send one into the
well-spring to reclaim being.
This is how he described the practice…
This type of breath work facilitates “access” to the spiritual and
emotional realms (for processing and releasing). It can provide an out
of body experience and help one reach higher planes of consciousness.
Ultimately it’s about connection with your Self and the universe and is
a healing experience.
It uses a stacked breathing technique, which is a deep inhale and
exhale, followed by a double inhale and then an exhale.
Your breath should be full and deep, filling your lungs completely. When
done properly, your belly should move outward a bit on the in breath.
When your lungs are almost full, you want to turn the breath around and
start exhaling… when your lungs are empty, you want to immediately turn
the breath around and start inhaling. This creates a circular breath
pattern whereby you are always breathing in or breathing out.
You want to breathe faster than normal, but remain relaxed and without
strain. Follow the music and let it support your breathing. The answer
to anything you encounter is in your breath, so keep breathing.
Start out slow and gentle with the first song. You may want to set an
intention. You may also want to ask for assistance from your higher
As the music speeds up, keep breathing. Give yourself permission to stay
with the process. You may want to scream, hum, laugh or cry. You may
want to chant. It’s okay to do these things.
The music will slow down towards the end as the journey unwinds to a
peaceful place. This type of breathwork offers a non-drug alternative
for the induction of psychedelic, therapeutic experiences. Remember to
I had decided that I wanted to dive into this breath work on one of the
given Sundays, so I gathered my self-contained breathing apparatus and
got ready to plunge.
Before the session started, fifteen other people, and myself, had
brought our air mattresses into the group room and laid there, prepared
to alter our consciousness without mind-altering substances and
hopefully come out the other end with something more than a booger.
As I saw everyone laying on their mattress, I couldn’t help but parallel
the vibe with that of an ayahuasca ceremony. Here
I am, sitting on a mat, surrounded by more than a dozen other people…and
we’re all about to go to a place we’ve never been, in hopes of emerging
with something we can apply for the betterment of ourselves.
Dean had given everyone in the room mind-folds to keep the light outside
from entering. This allowed for greater potential of inward travel. The
goal, for me, was to shine it onto
a place of tangled webs and mildew. I had to trust it would
direct itself where
I most needed it to
I felt a healthy apprehension as I knew I was about to enter into an
As countdown commenced, the music was already playing. It was bumping,
thumping, rattling my core. It was setting the ambiance for an upliftin’
diggin’. It was music that could lift the heaviest of saxophone players
and wipe the mold from even the mouths of gluttons.
When the lights “went out,” I began the breathing technique to turn the
engine into otherdrive.
I was laying flat on my back, hands over my stomach like a dead man. I
will stay in this position for the whole session, I
told myself. Being
physically still will allow the subtle bodies within me to move with
ease. If I need to wiggle myself free, then so be it, wiggle it’ll be.
My intention is to clear anything that needs to be cleared. Universe, I
trust you are with me, and Will, guide me.
After a few minutes of the stacked breathing, a flush of tingles washed
over me. My point of awareness started shifting and I slipped into a
non-ordinary state of consciousness. It overlapped the fringes of the
place where waking perception sets its eyes in the day time.
The music is playing. The bass is blaring. My eyes can’t see a thing. My
breath is getting in the groove. I’m getting involved. I’m opening up
from the inside out on a cellular level.
My body feels light.
I slip deeper into a place I’m familiar with, yet so oblivious to. It’s
a place below my normal awareness. I’m governed by this place to the
extent that I’m unaware of this place.
Light turns heavy. The lead blanket returns….
My friend, The Old Man saidelcome to your Emotional Body. It will be our
focus of transformation for the day.
Old Man where did you come from?
You should know by now, I’ve never left your side. It is when you take
the next step towards something beneficial to you that we communicate
Okay Old Man. I guess I’m learning how to perpetuate this Good Orderly
It’s about time.
It’s about moment. Movement in the moment. My friend, where we see the
color grey today, we’ll gravitate to. Let it happen. Where we see the
clog, we’ll shine. Allow it to move.
Laying on my back, still, I fall deeper. Images begin to enter my mind.
My past creeps up like an unsuccessful thief in the night.
The music is speeding up. It acts as a canoe.
Down a hole and through and through.
Stalwart Knight Jake. Stalwart Knight, I hear a voice.
A rampage of destruction bombards me like dirt being hurled from a
shovel. Self-inflicted torture grows a face. It screams at its
Or transformation. (A horse drinks from the water regardless of the
color bowl it’s in.)
The fiend rises from the cracks of nowhere like so many times before.
This time it’s burning.
Churning like butter dripping from a knife down into the whirlpool.
Smoke rises from the sound of the vanquish.
Breathe my friend. Breathe.
A steam cleaner awaits.
My body is in pain from the movement. It remembers the pathways.
Inside, I feel how much damage I’ve done to myself. The memory of this
damage moves beneath the surface.
My attention to it causes a positive resistance.
I feel a hint of wholeness of some type, from somewhere.
A life of its own is crawling under my skin. It makes it way to my face.
It’s slow. Lead like.
I keep still.
It finds a way.
Images from the mental to the physical to the sensational to the audible
begin to rise from the cracks of motion. They’re images of myself in a
A damned past.
A baleful memory of how life once was.
The music and my breath are inseparable.
My breath is music.
Tears start running down my face, and I cry out loud. The flood is
enough to drown ants and roaches.
I want the sun to shine in perfect harmony to balance the water, air and
earth. To feed the roots.
I don’t want anything or anyone to drown.
My soul wants me to proceed in becoming.
I breathe in circles.
My breath carries me further.
Wells and swells make mice look even smaller.
Inhale Exhale Inhale Inhale Exhale….
The heat of the star begins to pull the water up from the base.
The leaves blow in the wind.
The armor crumbles a little more from the movement within.
I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I say to myself, conceding to the harm done. Never
again! I cry in realization to it. My body had known about it all along.
I see the hurt that had been in my soul.
I reach out. It reaches in.
My form loosens up a notch.
Along with the tears, I’m sweating profusely. The heat generated by the
light of awareness has extended from the higher realms on down.
My tears have taken form of a healthy remorse. Where I had once
abandoned myself, acknowledgment had brought it back.
The movement of my emotions allows for flow. The flow allows for
communication with my soul once more as the mold cake thins.
Forgive yourself , my soul says to me.
I weep in waves.
I surf them. I can see the shore.
The tears from the pain and torture transform into something
forthcoming. The transformation is directly proportional to the degree
that my body becomes less stiff and encapsulated from the old and heavy
I let go.
Cold dead numbness is being filled with life. I see it happening.
There is no more ice, rigid and steel.
Where I was once in that hellish place, I had found an exit.
The music is still playing. My mind-fold is soaked. I’m still breathing.
I feel gratitude for being alive. I feel like I’ve shed a mountain of
skin. My body feels new. I feel lighter.
I roll in laughter at the absurd. I roll in laughter because it feels
good to laugh. It’s okay to let out sounds in rejoice of being alive.
I revel in my new body. Corks are popping on the cellular level.
The music is winding down.
There are no crocodiles swimming in the Nile any longer.
There’s some type of cohesiveness in the new state I find myself in.
There’s assurance in the vulnerable.
Compassion has a voice and it speaks with impeccable direction of the
My smile is genuine again.
Thanks to a powerful force flowing through the universe, I’m still
When I returned to my physical body from the ocean, I realized that I
had not moved one inch the entire time. I had literally traveled to a
more subtle body to
mine, and makeit move.
I marveled at how incredibly light I was. I felt the energy flowing
within me. Forgiveness had set it free.
My friend, The Old Man had then said…now
that is what I call participating. Do not stop here though. You must
continue to dance to the music of life. There will be more maintenance
sessions in the future. Until then, consider every moment one for such.
Some will allow you to clear deeper the layers hidden by grime…some will
also allow you to see better where you need to place your feet. All will
encompass the two at some junction, so long as you open to the sound.
Thank you Old Man. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
It is my pleasure. Remember my friend, life is an ongoing process of
Thank you. Thank you.
The pleasure’s mine.
Dean, the eternity suited geometrician/LCDC runs a YouTube channel
Direction and I highly recommend checking out some of the videos he
has on there. Also, check him out at www.accessbreath.org for
more information on using the breath to heal.
Thank you for reading.
The sessions we did were about an hour and a half to two hours. The
breath must be stronger and faster than just normal relaxed breathing. I
don’t want to use the word “forced breath” but it’s almost like that,
although it’s more of a strong breath from the abdomen in-out-inin-out.
For me, once I found a rhythm, I literally could feel my body tingling,
as if I were just at the threshold of entering a different state of
In a few sessions I did, there were people in there who had never
meditated before, and they seemed to have some good experiences. I think
the most important thing is to get the breathing down and stick with it.
I know what you mean though, an hour and half is a very long time, and
sometimes it was a challenge to follow through with it. In fact,
sometimes I would catch myself not following through with it, but then
push myself to continue. But I guess the reason I say this is: As
meditation seems like something whose effects build the more it is
practiced, this type of breath work was lift off from the rocket pad